Ahhhh the good ol’ days..

Kids programing in the late 80s and early 90s was pretty shitty. They did hit on a few key elements that any kid would be totally fucking into though. I think any television show/monster truck rally/baptism/etc. can be made better by adding any of the following elements. Try it out and let me know how it goes.

First up, pies….lots of fucking pies…

You ain’t shit unless you have pies. Kids love pies, hitting people with them, throwing them, eating them…whatever. Get some pies on your show and you are good as gold.



Slime
Same thing as pies, this stuff is serious business! If you can work in pies AND slime, shit man, you’ve got a hit!


Kids dumping stuff on other kids
What’s not to love?! There is no better way to celebrate a win, than to pour a bunch of shit on your loser opponents head.

Dumb kids
Nuff said?

Really dumb kids
I blame the parents.

Ecto Cooler
While we’re at it lets bring back Ecto Coolers. Most TV shows look cooler after you’ve had 13 of these things to drink and downed a couple dozen pixie sticks. Trust me.

Actually, after watching all these clips, I’ve realized all this shit sucks…Never mind, I don’t want this stuff back.

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